


Whiplash

by soft_satan



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boyfriends, Car Accidents, Carjacking, Drama, Drama & Romance, Established Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Established Relationship, Eventual Romance, Explosions, Firefam Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Hurt Evan "Buck" Buckley, Hurt/Comfort, Lack of Communication, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Misunderstandings, Mugging, Presumed Dead, Romance, Romantic Fluff, Sad, Sad Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Soft Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley, Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Temporary Hearing Loss, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Whump, Worried Firefam, Worried Firehouse 118 Crew (9-1-1 TV), firefam - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:07:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27891250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soft_satan/pseuds/soft_satan
Summary: She parked near him and got out, avoiding the puddle as she approached him. Hands on her hips, she shook her head in pity. “What on earth happened to you?”He looked up at her with a pained smile, his shoulders instantly sagging with relief at the sight of her. “I got carjacked.”...Thanks to a lack of communication, a horrific accident leads the team to fear the worst.
Relationships: Eddie Diaz & Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Eddie Diaz & Howie "Chimney" Han (9-1-1 TV), Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) & Bobby Nash, Evan "Buck" Buckley & Athena Grant, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 868





	Whiplash

**Author's Note:**

> heyooooo so this is NOT the fic i was supposed to be working on, but i was in a mood and craving something specific so here we are.

“I hate working without you.”

Buck looked up to the door of the locker room as he pulled his shirt over his head. Eddie had been leaning against the door frame, ankles and arms crossed, watching Buck dressing for the last several minutes. Giving him a small smirk, Buck slipped his sneakers on without untying the laces and stood, stretching his arms up over his head. Eddie knew damn well it was just as an excuse to flex for him, but he wasn’t complaining.

“I hate you working without me, too,” Buck agreed, moving into Eddie’s personal space. “Who’s gonna have your back when I’m not there?”

Eddie slipped his arms around Buck’s waist and pulled him into his chest. “It’s not me I worry about, Mr. Danger Magnet.”

Buck huffed a laugh, draping his arms over Eddie’s shoulders. “I’m just going to swing by the grocery store, then go straight home. Chris is already at his sleepover with Denny, and Karen is dropping him off at school in the morning, so I will be in bed, safe and sound, ready for cuddles when you get home.”

“Can’t wait,” Eddie purred.

After a quick glance to make sure no one was watching, he captured Buck’s lips in a soft, slow kiss. Buck sighed blissfully as he broke the kiss, his eyes shining with love and desire. Eddie could’t stop the indignant huff the second Buck stepped away from him, grabbing his bag and slinging the strap over his shoulder.

“Be careful out there,” Buck told him, stealing another kiss as he passed him in the doorway. “I love you.”

“Love you, too,” Eddie smiled, watching his boyfriend walk out of the bay doors. If the way he was strutting was anything to go by, Buck knew full well that Eddie was staring at his ass.

“You got it baaaad,” Hen teased, slinging an arm over his shoulders.

“Yeah, I do.” Once Buck was out of sight, Eddie grinned and leaned closer to whisper to her. He knew he had a rosy blush burning his face, but he was too happy to really care. “And in a few days, he’s not going to be my boyfriend anymore.”

A look of shock and horror passed over Hen’s face. “What? Are you break- ooooh my god…” she breathed, her eyes going from sad to excited in a flash. “Oh my god, really?!"

He shushed her softly, glancing around the station to make sure no one else had heard. “You cannot tell Chim, okay? You can’t even tell Karen. I’m too afraid it’ll get back to Maddie.”

Hen gave him a disbelieving stare. “You really think Maddie would spoil her brother’s--”

He cut her off with a glare. “Don’t.”

“...you know what.” she amended. “She’d never do that.”

“Not on purpose,” he agreed as the two of them started up the stairs to the loft. “But you know she likes to stare at Buck with a goofy smile when she knows something he doesn’t. I can’t take any chances. I want it to be a complete surprise.”

“Want what to be a surprise?” Chim asked, head perking up from where he sat at the dining table.

“Boy, mind your business,” Hen chided.

Chim put his hands up in surrender, returning his attention to the laptop in front of him. Eddie motioned for Hen to follow him over to the pinball machine, well away from listening ears.

“So it’s a total surprise?” Hen asked, brow furrowing. “No offense, but are you sure he’s ready? Have you two even talked about marriage?”

“Are you kidding me? Buck’s been ready,” Eddie laughed. “He asked me to marry him the first time we kissed. It was a joke, but turns out, it also kind of wasn’t.”

Her eyes shined with fondness. “That’s adorable.”

“He’s just been waiting for me to be ready. And he’s been  _ so _ patient, Hen. He hasn’t pushed me or brought it up once since we talked about it months ago. And the other day, I realized…” Eddie couldn’t have wiped the joy from his face if he’d wanted to. “I was feeling the need to run again, but for once, I didn’t want to run away. I want to run  _ toward _ it. Toward him. Toward our future.”

With a happy sigh, she pulled him into a tight embrace. “I’m so happy for you two.”

“Thanks,” he laughed softly as she let him go. “Now I just have to hope he hasn’t changed his mind about it.”

“Eddie, seriously?” She gave him a cocked brow, hands on her hips. “That boy has loved you since the day you met.”

Eddie scrunched up his brows in confusion. “He hated me when we met.”

“Okay, since day two.”

…

As soon as he was out of the station, it was like a lead blanket had been draped over his shoulders. Maybe it was that his body knew he was getting closer and closer to his bed, or perhaps it was just the lack of Eddie in his immediate vicinity zapping his energy. Either way, Buck was tired and ready to collapse into bed.

But first, he needed to go by the store. It was the last thing he wanted to do after a long shift, but it was better than having to get out of bed the next day before it was absolutely necessary. They wouldn’t need to get up until around 2pm to go get Christopher from school, and Buck was very much looking forward to a long, lazy morning in bed with Eddie.

Well, maybe not  _ lazy _ …

After about an hour of shopping, 20 minutes of standing in line, and 15 minutes of a tired, vacant-eyed teenage cashier ringing him up, he emerged from the store with his grocery bags in hand. Relieved that the ordeal was over, he made his way out to his Jeep in the back of the parking lot. Even after a 24 hour shift, Buck never parked too close to the entrance. Of course he would take the closest spot he could get when he had Christopher, but when he was alone, Buck hated to take those spots from people who needed them. Even when the store was nearing closing time and the lot was almost empty, it just didn’t feel right.

Setting a few of the bags down on the ground by the Jeep, he pulled out his keys and fumbled to grab the remote with one hand. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to park under a burnt out street light, or in the back corner of the lot, but Buck was strong, solid, taller than average. He figured it was better him than someone else.

At least, until the startling chill of metal pressed against the back of his neck.

“Give me the keys and I let you live.”

Buck had to remind himself to breathe as his heart fell to the bottom of his stomach. He raised the hand in which he was clutching his keys and held them out on one finger, not even turning his head to look back. If he didn’t see his face, he didn’t have a reason to kill him. His Jeep was important, but not as important as making sure he got home to Chris and Eddie “Take it, man. I won’t fight, I won’t look at you. Just go.”

The keys were snatched off his finger and for a second, Buck thought he was in the clear. And then something hard came down on the back of his head. The gallon of milk he’d been holding hit the ground, bursting out across the pavement just in time for Buck to land in it. His face hit the pavement with a wet splash and he felt his cheek and chin instantly start to sting. He didn’t lose consciousness, but the entire parking lot started to tilt and spin like a shitty carnival ride as he tried to sit up. When a hard boot connected with his ribs, Buck’s vision turning white had nothing to do with the puddle of milk he dropped back into with a splash. He felt the guy rifle through his pockets and realized he was taking his phone and wallet, but Buck wouldn’t have resisted if he could have. Before he was able to see clearly again, much less move, he heard the car bleep, the door open and slam shut, and the engine roar to life. The Jeep backed out and sped off out of the parking lot faster than was necessary or safe. Figuring it was safe to try to get up now, Buck slowly pushed himself up onto his hands and knees, breathing through the pain in his ribs. He sat back on his heels and wiped the milk out of his eyes, head pounding as his vision swirled and swam. Feeling for his stuff, he wasn’t surprised to find his pockets empty, but it still made him angry and a bit anxious. With a sigh he plopped down onto his ass and stretched his long legs out in front of him, staring off in the direction his Jeep had gone, unsure of what to do next.

…

When Athena pulled into the grocery store, the first thing that caught her eye was the large puddle of grimy white liquid in one of the parking spots. The second thing she noticed, and perhaps the most startling, was the man sitting beside it. His clothes were dirty and looked damp, and next to him sat a little pile of grocery bags. He lifted a hand to shield his eyes from her flashing lights, the other hand holding something to the back of his head. Athena released a tired sigh. Of course Buck was involved.

She parked near him and got out, avoiding the puddle as she approached him. Hands on her hips, she shook her head in pity. “What on earth happened to you?”

He looked up at her with a pained smile, his shoulders instantly sagging with relief at the sight of her. “I got carjacked.”

“You just can’t catch a break, can you?”

He shrugged. “At least he didn’t shoot me.”

Her blood ran cold, eyes widening. “He was armed?”

“Yeah, he hit me with it.”

“Alright, I’m calling for an RA and then you’re telling me exactly what happened.”

Buck released a whine that was anything but mature. “No, Athena, I’m fine.”

“Then why are you holding a bag of frozen vegetables to your head?” she challenged, arching an eyebrow. “You’re getting checked over. Whether that’s by a paramedic or an ER doctor is the only choice you have on the matter.”

Maybe it was a little wrong to get a sense of satisfaction out of his sigh of defeat, but as long as she got confirmation that Buck was okay, she didn’t care. Once the unit was requested, she crouched down in front of him and gently took his chin between her fingertips. He had a few scrapes on his cheek and along his jaw, and she softly turned his head this way and that to inspect it. His eyes were clear but misty, and he seemed to be pretty coherent.

“Are you okay?” she asked, letting go of his chin and touching the tip of his nose to get him to smile. “And I don’t mean physically. The medics will be the judge of that.”

“Yeah, I’m okay. Just really tired and annoyed. He took my phone and wallet, too.”

“You want me to call anyone for you?”

He shook his head. “Nah, just an Uber once we’re done here.”

She leveled him with the soft glare she used when her kids did something dumb. “If you think I’m going to let you take an Uber home when I can drive you myself, you must have gotten hit harder than I thought.”

He smiled sheepishly. “Thanks, Athena.”

She fondly patted his unscratched cheek and stood, pulling out her notepad. “Now, tell me exactly what happened.”

…

The night was crawling on slowly. It had been at least two hours since Buck left the station that they finally got a call. A tanker truck had run a red light, and some poor soul had smashed into the side of it. Dispatch had reported that the tanker truck driver was unharmed, but the other driver was trapped inside their car and didn’t look like they were in good shape.

They were getting close, and Eddie stretched the crick out of his neck in preparation. It was going to be a rough call, but it would probably keep them busy for at least a couple hours, and for that silver lining Eddie was grateful. The faster his shift ended, the sooner he got to crawl into bed, wrap himself around Buck, and sleep.

“Oh god no…”

It was said no louder than a breath, but everyone heard Bobby over the headsets, and a general air of anxiety washed over the crew as they shared curious looks. Whatever the Captain was looking at, it was bad.

“What is it, Cap?” Eddie dared to ask, turning to look out the windshield as they pulled to a stop.

When his eyes caught sight of the wreck, a rush of ice cold terror shot through Eddie’s chest. The front end of the Jeep was completely crushed under the side of the tanker truck. From the point of impact, thick black smoke and bright red flames twisted together in a morbid dance.

The LAFD license plate, the LAFD logo sticker in the corner of the back window. There was no mistaking it.

Suddenly Eddie couldn’t breathe, but he was out of the truck faster than any of them, running straight toward the wreckage. Vaguely he could hear Bobby shouting orders, but his voice was drowned out by Eddie’s heart pounding in his ears. His only focus was on the silhouette of the person in the driver’s seat, lifting their head from the cracked window. He had to hurry. They had to get him out of the car before--

It exploded.

…

A deep sigh of relief rushed out of Buck as they pulled up to the curb. Athena put the car in park and looked over at him with a critical eye. He had some gauze wrapped around his head, holding a bandage over the spot he’d been pistol whipped, and some ointment on the road rash on the side of his face. The medic had ruled out any fractures to his ribs, but he would have a nasty bruise for the next week. He looked bone deep tired, but he was okay.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to call anyone for you, Buckaroo? I’m sure Bobby would let Eddie come home early.”

“Nah, no need to worry him.” Buck waved her off with a grateful smile. “Honestly, all I want is to take a shower and go to bed. I’ll tell him what happened when he gets home in the morning.”

She shrugged. “Alright. I won’t say anything about it when I stop by there later. What about getting in? You don't have your keys.”

"Hidden spare," he winked.

She stared at him for a moment. "Please tell me it's not one of those fake rocks…"

"No, but we do have one as a decoy," he smirked. "I hid one under the back porch."

She was going to have to give these boys a crash course on home safety. "Do not put it back."

He shrugged and leaned in to give her a hug. "Thanks for everything."

Immediately she leaned away from him, scrunching her nose as she shoved him back to the other side of the car. “Uh uh, don’t you dare get that sour milk smell on me.”

He snorted a laugh and got out, opening the back door to grab his bags. "Be safe out there," he said, giving her a tired grin and a wave before he shut the door.

With a fond smile she watched him go up to the porch and set the groceries down, then head through the gate to the back yard. She worried about that boy more than she worried about her own kids. Like Buck, May and Harry were brave and always willing to help someone in need, but they seemed to have a better sense of self preservation than Buck did. He wasn't dumb, that she knew from the moment he used a water canon to save her life, but he was too willing to give his own life to save another. Plus, the boy was a damn danger magnet. The possibility of outliving Buck was something she didn’t like to think about.

When he came back out front a moment later, he looked surprised to see her still sitting there, but she just gave him a smile and a wave. He grinned and waved back, then went about unlocking the door and toting the groceries inside. As soon as he was inside and the door was shut, she drove away, satisfied that all of her kids were safe at home.

…

Everything was spinning when he blinked his eyes open. Smoke billowed up into the night sky, the intense red flames swirling up into the black cloud above him. What the hell was that from? For a moment, Eddie couldn’t think. His ears were ringing, his face hot and already soaked in sweat. His head was pounding and his eyes were burning in the cool night air. What happened? An IED? No, he wasn’t in Afghanistan. There weren’t enough stars above him.

And then a face was hovering above him, familiar and concerned. Chimney. He was talking to him, hands patting Eddie’s face, but his voice was nothing more than a muffled hum. He shook his head, pointing to his ears. Chimney nodded in understanding and continued to check him over. Eddie just lay there for a moment, letting his friend poke and prod him. What happened? He couldn’t ask, since he wouldn’t even hear the answer. Were they on a call?

And then he remembered.

Eddie sat up so fast he knocked Chim back onto his ass. The rest of the team was already attacking the flames with hoses, but the blaze was fighting back with everything it had, raging on bright and hot even from several yards away. A hand on his shoulder startled him, and he looked back at Chimney. Eddie still couldn’t hear him, but the expression on his face was enough to know what he was saying.

_ It’s too late _ .

He slowly turned back to look at the blaze that had engulfed his boyfriend’s Jeep. Everything inside him was telling Eddie to get up and _ run _ , to  _ try _ , but he didn’t need to be a firefighter to know that Chimney was right. So he just sat there, watching his future go up in flames until his vision blurred.

…

Eddie had been completely useless after the explosion. He was shaking, still in shock, and he couldn’t hear a damn thing. So when Bobby ordered Chimney to take him to the hospital to get checked out, Eddie didn’t argue. There was no reason for him to stay there. Buck was…

There was no reason for him to stay there.

So he laid in the back of the ambulance with Chimney at his side, another medic from the 118 driving. Compliant or just too numb to care what was happening to him, Eddie just laid there as Chim checked him over. He couldn’t hear him, but Eddie knew the routine well enough that all Chim had to do was point and he did whatever Chim wanted him to.

Chimney, bless him, stayed by his side once they got to the ER. He knew what had happened better than Eddie did, and he knew enough about Eddie’s medical history and allergies that he could trust Chimney to answer the questions Eddie couldn’t even hear. Chim was a good friend, and once the fog of grief cleared from Eddie’s mind, he would tell him as much.

Eddie stayed silent throughout his time at the ER, barely staying aware enough to follow any orders he was given to turn this way or lay that way. It wasn’t until discharge papers were handed over for him to sign that he realized he had zoned out for most of the hours he’d been there. He knew he had gotten x-rays and an MRI, but only by assumption based on his medical knowledge. It had all passed in a blur.

By the time Chim was guiding him out toward the ER lobby, a comforting hand on his shoulder, he was starting to hear again. It was still muffled, as if he were under water, but he was starting to be able to make out some words, if spoken loud enough.

When they walked out of the double doors into the lobby, his tired eyes immediately landed on Bobby, who looked about as destroyed as Eddie felt. The Captain was sitting in a chair near the exit, elbows on his knees and face in his hands, still in his turnout coat and covered in soot. Eddie heard the muffled sound of Chimney’s voice, saying Bobby’s name he was pretty sure. The Captain looked up and immediately shot up out of his chair, meeting them halfway and pulling Eddie into a crushing hug. Bobby’s hugs were rare, but always warm and comforting no matter the situation. Chim was giving Bobby the rundown on his condition, muffled and too quiet for Eddie to understand, but at the moment he really didn’t care. When Bobby let him go, the older man’s eyes were glistening with misery. The Captain didn’t say anything, probably because he knew Eddie couldn’t hear him, and pulled something from the pocket of his coat. With a shaking hand he held it out for him to take, and Eddie’s heart plummeted. Even charred and half melted, he recognized the wallet. His vision blurred as he took it, slowly opening it up. The cards inside were melted together, but the one behind what was once a clear plastic film was slightly less damaged than the others. Buck’s bright smile stared up at him from the soot covered driver’s license, evaporating the single drop of hope Eddie had felt that maybe it wasn’t his Jeep.

…

Eddie sat silently in the backseat, eyes glued to the burnt wallet despite the darkness of the truck. Chimney had his elbow propped up on the windowsill, eyes covered with his hand. He’d been just as silent as Eddie for the whole ride, and Bobby didn’t disturb either of them, lost in his own thoughts as he drove.

It was when Bobby was pulling into his parking spot at the station that Chimney finally broke the silence, his voice soft and ragged with emotion. “What am I supposed to tell Maddie?”

Bobby took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Wait for a positive ID. I know we have the license, but it’s better to know for sure before you tell her.”

“Right. Make sure her brother is actually dead before I break her heart and ruin her life,” Chim bit out, glancing over at Bobby with a humorless huff. “Yeah, I guess that’s a good idea.”

The back door opened suddenly, and before either of them could look back, Eddie was slamming it shut. Chimney sighed and got out, Bobby following right behind them.

By the time they made it inside, Hen had Eddie wrapped in a crushing hug, tear tracks glistening on her face. Clearing his throat, Bobby looked around the entire station, barely holding onto his composure as he took in the anguished faces of his subordinates, his friends, his family. Projecting his voice for all of them to hear, he addressed every member of the 118.

“Everyone listen up. As of now, the 118 is available for backup support only. If you are one hundred percent certain that you are able to be focused and collected, you can stay. Otherwise, you are welcome to go home early.” He looked around at them all, his voice threatening to break as he continued. “We just suffered a great loss. You will not be judged, either personally or professionally, for needing to go home, or for staying. Buck is… was…” Blinking back tears, Bobby cleared his throat of the emotion stuck there. “We all love Buck, we’re all hurting, so take care of yourselves.”

“Bobby?” Eddie’s hesitant rasp brought the Captain’s attention back to the other man, Chimney and Hen on either side of him as if waiting to catch him should he fall. It was the first time he’d heard Eddie’s voice since they got to the scene of the accident. “I think… I need to go home.”

“Eddie, you can barely hear. Of course you’re going home,” Bobby spoke loud enough for him to hear, giving him a sad smile. “Do you need one of us to drive you?”

Eddie didn’t smile, or really show any emotion at all. He simply shook his head and stalked off toward the locker room.

“He was gonna propose.”

Hen’s broken whisper had Bobby’s wide eyes on her in an instant. Her lip was trembling, tear-filled eyes staring at Eddie through the glass wall of the locker room.

Chimney stared at her, the color all but gone from his face. “What?”

“He told me earlier tonight, after Buck left.” Her voice broke on the last word, and Chimney put an arm around her shoulders for comfort. “He was so excited.”

Eddie emerged from the locker room still in his uniform, soot still smudged across his face, his bag slung over his shoulder and keys in his hand. Mouth set in a firm line, his expression was completely blank, but Bobby knew him well enough to see the pure devastation in his eyes.

Bobby didn’t think his heart could break anymore than it already had, but there it went.

…

When Athena strolled into the 118 on her break, she was not expecting the skeleton crew. It was late, and she was sure more than a few of them were getting some sleep in the bunk room, but even the parking lot had been more empty than usual. She ascended the stairs quickly, her concern growing rapidly with every sad face she saw. It was like a dark cloud was hanging over the station.

When she reached the loft, she found her husband sitting at the dinner table with his face in his hands, his shoulders sagging with the weight of the world. On either side of him sat Chimney, staring into space with a blank look in his eyes, and Hen looking into her coffee dejectedly.

“You all look like someone ran over your puppy,” Athena stated, making the three of them jump. Three pairs of eyes finally landed on her, wide and… were those tears? Her stomach flipped. Something had happened. Something awful. “Can someone please tell me what is going on? What happened?”

“You may want to sit down,” Chim offered, pushing out the chair between himself and Bobby for her.

“I’m fine standing.” She crossed her arms, coming to stand at Bobby’s side but looking to each of them expectantly. “Someone better start talking.”

Bobby sighed and scrubbed his face with his hands. “A few hours ago, we responded to a call about an accident. A tanker truck had run a red light and caused another vehicle to crash into the tank. It…” His voice broke, and Athena’s chest tightened at the small sound. She laid a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it softly to give him her strength. “It exploded almost as soon as we got there, with the driver still inside.” He finally met her gaze, and Athena felt her heart break over the tear sliding down her husband’s face. “Athena… it was Buck.”

Athena stared at her husband with wide eyes, then glanced to Hen, Chim, and back to Bobby. They all looked absolutely gutted, their eyes rimmed with red and glistening with tears.

It should not be funny.

Athena snorted, covering her mouth with her hand to fight back the smile.

“Athena?” Hen asked, bewildered at the full on belly laugh that finally bubbled up and out of Athena.

“I’ve heard of people grieving in weird ways, but isn’t laughing a little insensitive?” Chim remarked, sounding a bit offended.

“Oh my god, I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” Athena giggled, wiping her eyes. She lovingly stroked Bobby’s cheek with her knuckles. “You poor things. Buck is alive.”

Bobby shook his head, confusion creasing his brow. “We’re still waiting on the ME to confirm with dental records, but it was his Jeep. We even found his wallet inside.”

“And Buck was mugged and carjacked this evening. I dropped him off at home just a couple hours ago. He’s a little scuffed up and bruised, but he’s fine. Not even a concussion.”

The three sitting at the table looked at each other, eyes wide and mouths agape. Athena couldn’t stop herself from chuckling a bit more, until something occurred to her. Someone was missing.

“Wait…” She glanced around the loft, concern snuffing out her amusement. “Where’s Eddie?”

…

From the corner of his eye Eddie saw his phone lying in the seat next to him, the screen lighting up with a call. He didn’t even spare a glance to see who it was, letting it ring until it went to voicemail. The one person he wanted to talk to was the one person it couldn’t be, and he didn’t have the emotional strength to talk to anyone else. Not that he could really hear them if he did answer. It had been a couple hours, but everything was still muffled and somewhat drowned out by ringing. He could barely hear his ringtone as it started up again.

He pulled into the driveway and his chest tightened to see it void of the familiar gray Jeep. The phone lit up again as he shut off the car and he grabbed it, rejecting the call from Hen and ignoring the unread texts. Before another call or text could come through, he turned the phone off completely. She was most likely calling to tell him they’d confirmed it was Buck, and Eddie just wasn’t ready to face that truth yet.

He sat there in the dark for a long moment, staring at the house. Buck had helped him find it, before they were together. The house he’d rented when he and Chris had just gotten to LA was nice, but a bit too far away from Christopher’s private school. He had felt guilty about using Shannon’s life insurance money for anything, as if he was using her death for his personal gain. But Buck had reminded him that she’d loved Christopher, and she would have wanted him to grow up in a house he could call his own. And when Buck showed Eddie the listing for the house, explained how it was in his price range and close to the school, the station, and Abuela, it seemed too good to be true.

Buck was too good to be true.

What was he going to tell Christopher?

He had considered picking his son up from his sleepover on the way home, but it was late, and Eddie felt awful at the thought of waking Chris up just to break his heart. A few more hours of peaceful rest and blissful ignorance wasn’t going to hurt anything.

And if he were honest, Eddie felt he needed a bit of time alone to grieve before he had to put on a brave face for his son. He’d been feeling himself teetering on the edge of a breakdown since Bobby had given him the wallet.

Sluggishly, he finally got out of the truck, leaving his bag in the passenger seat because he just didn’t care enough to grab it. He moved up the walk feeling like gravity had increased just for him, pushing him down, trying to crush him. On autopilot he got the door unlocked and stepped in, barely thinking to lock it back up behind him. He left the lights off to spare his pounding head, moving down the dark hallway on memory alone. Finding the bedroom door was easy enough, running his fingers along the wall until he felt the cold handle on his fingertips. Taking a moment to prepare himself, he pushed it open and immediately his tears spilled over. He could feel Buck’s presence as if he were standing right beside him, smell the sandalwood and citrus of his favorite cologne. The blackout curtains were still drawn, shutting out the glow of the street light and leaving the room in pitch black darkness, and Eddie left it that way. He shut the door and made his way to the bed on muscle memory, sitting down on his side.

A deep, aching sob stole his breath. He couldn’t hold it in anymore. He’d reached his breaking point. His entire body was trembling with agonizing grief. Tears streamed down his face unchecked as he gasped for breath between sobs, unable to control the pathetic whimper in the back of his throat.

When the bedside light behind him flicked on, Eddie choked on his own breath as he leaped up from the bed, heart pounding in his chest as he spun around. The last thing he expected to see was Buck sitting up in bed, curls a frizzy mess and face pinched in a look of pure concern despite the haze of sleep in his eyes. Buck’s mouth was moving, but Eddie couldn’t hear his voice over the pounding of his pulse in his ears.

Eddie choked out another sob, a smile splitting his face. In a flash he was kneeling on the bed, taking Buck’s face in his hands and crashing their lips together. Despite the surprise and the humm of shock Eddie could feel in his palms and against his lips, Buck responded almost immediately. Buck fell back onto his pillow and Eddie loyally followed, catching himself on his hands to lower himself down gently.

When he felt Buck lightly push against his shoulders Eddie pulled away, pushing himself back up onto his hands. Buck wiped a drop of wetness off his cheek and looked at it on his fingers, glancing back up at Eddie in concern and confusion. Gently, he took Eddie’s face in his hands, gliding his thumbs under his eyes to clear away the tears.

“What happened?” Buck asked, his words a muffled hum.

“I can’t really hear much, there was an explosion,” Eddie explained, breathless but oh, so happy. Buck’s eyes widened but Eddie smiled and shook his head, dipping down to steal a quick peck. “I’m okay. And you…” Another tear landed on Buck’s cheek. “You’re okay. You’re alive. How are you alive? Your Jeep…”

“Was stolen,” Buck finished, raising his voice a little to make it a bit easier for Eddie to make out what he was saying. His brows shot up as what Eddie said sank in. “Did my Jeep explode?”

Eddie nodded, his face aching with how wide he was smiling. He carefully dropped back down on top of his beautiful boyfriend. Nuzzling his face into the crook of Buck’s neck, Eddie slid his arms up under Buck’s back, just to hold him closer. “I thought you were in it. I thought…”

Immediately, Buck wrapped his arms around him, one hand drawing soothing circles on his back and the other carding through his hair. Eddie could barely make out the words of comfort he was saying, but the rise and fall of Buck’s chest against his own was all the comfort he needed.

“Marry me.”

Buck’s hands stilled for a moment, and Eddie burrowed his face deeper into his scent. With tenderness and care, Buck took Eddie’s face in his hands and guided him out of the crook of his neck. They were barely inches apart, but far enough that Eddie could see the glisten of tears in Buck’s blue eyes. Eddie could barely hear the answer, but Buck’s radiant smile and enthusiastic nod told him everything he needed to hear.

“Yes.”

Eddie captured Buck’s lips once again, the emotional whiplash of going from agonizing misery to pure bliss making his head spin. This kiss was slower, softer, but still brimming with joy and love as Buck’s arms wrapped around his shoulders. Completely overcome with happiness, Eddie couldn’t stop himself from bursting into a tearful chortle. Buck snorted then, breaking the kiss as he too dissolved into soft laughter. Eddie burrowed his face back into Buck’s neck, and they both tightened their hold on each other as they lost themselves in their giggles.


End file.
